Some weeks are better than other weeks...
Some days are better than other days...
Actually, some moments are way better than other moments!
Do you ever feel like your victories are few and far between?
I have really been beating myself up lately over my lack of writing. I have stressed myself out over it at times to the point of writing paralysis… if that is even a thing!!!
A few days ago, I had myself so worked up, wondering that maybe God had taken this gift away from me!
As I have been praying about this for weeks now… checking my heart… asking God to show me what I should be doing differently. There has been a deafening silence from God in this one area.
Then I recently heard someone speaking about
God’s presence is always present… there are just times that we may not be present in His presence.
Wowser! So simple and yet… my pea-brain could not see that I was letting stress rule in my life! Stress! Stressed-out… life-zapping… brain-freezing… victory-taking… joy-stealing… poor-excuse for an emotion… sad-excuse as a ruler… STRESS!
What have I let stress me out? Within the last couple weeks…
Taxes had to be filed, which we prepare ourselves (2 businesses and our personal).
Hosted a fun night of card making with a group of ladies (fun, but some extra work).
I had a colonoscopy (and all the fun that goes along with that! ‘Nough said!).
Dealing with negative people on a daily basis, (no names mentioned).
The winter that didn’t want to give into spring (so behind on outdoor clean up).
The hot-flashes that have ramped-up once again (mostly at night of course).
Hit a plateau in my weight loss for weeks!
And to top it all off, I had a crown come out and broke off the rest of the tooth under it! (now to have an oral surgeon pull the rest of that tooth!)
I could go on and on, but I won’t bore you with anymore of my stress-related angst!
I know we all have those things in life… and the things I mentioned may not seem like a big deal to you… I realize other people are dealing with way worse in their daily life, but…
After I realized it was stress that was eating me up… stopping me from soaking in God’s presence… I felt so convicted!
No, I didn’t stress more over it! I went to God and told Him I was sorry for letting this happen! And I was reminded of the words God has given me in the past that I share so often with others, “Do you trust ME?”
Once again… I had stopped trusting Him for everything!
Why do we think we can do any of it on our own? On a good week, we might make it to Wednesday before exhaustion from trying to do it all takes us out!
Can I get an “Amen!”?
After confessing to God for my wrong… BTW, He is a really good Forgiver! I knew I had to ask for forgiveness from my hubby too! I came to him and told him what I had been shown, as I began to cry (I know what a surprise!), Luke said he already had. The man is a saint! Considering the night before I wanted to hit someone in the face with a frying pan!!! (Oops… did I really just write that?)
Sorry… I know I am all over the place with this, but… I say all this to share a verse with you all:
who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began, ~ 2 Timothy 1:9
As I read this verse, here is what tugged on my heart... I know what God has shown me and what He has called me to… I won’t lose that because of what I do or don’t do… my willing, obedient heart will be used for His purpose covered by His grace, given through Christ Jesus.
He loves me so much! I can hardly contain myself just grasping even a little of what that means!
And you know, we each have a holy calling for God’s purpose and grace! I love this whole verse, but especially the part, “in Christ Jesus before time began.” Sa-weet!
And remember, any victory… no matter how small… is still a victory!
My flesh and my heart fail; but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. ~ Psalms 73:26
In His Grace, Carin
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